The curious thoughts of a sociopath

Last night I watched Young Adult, a movie about a sexy, interesting, albeit sociopathic woman (Charlize Theron, whose looks make her unmitigated lunacy tolerable) who for reasons only she understands, thinks it is a foregone conclusion that she will be with her old high school flame, even though this is over fifteen years later and he has a kid and wife. Patton Oswalt's character attempts to help her see the folly of her plan, but she can't even comprehend the idea that it won't work.  Such is the way of all the sociopaths we know right?

So what is it that is missing from sociopaths brain that makes them this way?  From what I've experienced with people I suspect of having this mental illness, I don't think it is a total lack of emotional attachment.  In fact these people seem to become so fixated on certain people that their emotions are directly related to how those people view them.  Their biggest fear is that those people who validate their misguided point of view, in most cases out of fear of hurting the sociopaths feelings, will leave them behind in life.

My thinking is most sociopaths are extremely depressed, but are completely unaware of that fact.  Their relationships are all hollow and have no real meaning because simply put, people don't trust them, and why would we? These are people that will take every advantage of us and not feel an ounce of guilt about doing so.  Their concern for our well being is shallow and selfish, since the only reason they have us as a friend is to validate their warped view of reality like I said earlier. 

Yet typically we all have a friend or two like this, and it's not because we need them, not even close.  Our lives would be better off, sometimes dramatically better, as this is always a one way relationship which benefits only the sociopath. So why do we allow these people into our lives and have such a difficult time separating from them? Because we're not sociopaths. Because we care about the well being of people, and because of that fact we think it our duty to help these people in whatever way we can.  But the harsh reality is we can't do anything.

So in the end of the movie (Spoiler alert), and as is the case with sociopaths, Therons character is completely depressed about her life, and in comes the concerned friend who tells her that all of her life is totally perfect and she doesn't need to change, and that is all she needs to hear. 

Because for sociopaths, being right is all that matters, and it's not them that needs to change, it's everyone else.  So if a sociopath is reading this, you're perfect! Disregard everything I just wrote and continue on with your awesome life!

Girls are pretty

I wouldn't say I'm egotistical but I don't often give thought to things that don't affect me in some way.  I think that's pretty normal but something we don't really acknowledge because it sounds so self centered and not endearing.  But it is totally true, because more often than not I do give great thought to how my decisions will affect me.  It just varies on long term effect and short term effect.  My problem is that I think long term but can only make effective decisions for myself in the short term.  For example, when I have a desire, whether it be to write a screenplay, run a 5k race, or forget those two previous ideas and write a blog, I act on that with the intent on making myself happy at the current moment. The only time we really regret things is when they're still affecting us after they happened.  (Editors note: Vince just went on facebook for 10 minutes, then he typed this because he thought that was amusing. Third person is fun.) For example if I go see a shitty movie, which is quite often these days, I pay for a ticket, lose that hour and a half, and go on with my life.  Maybe I shit on the movie to people but in general I forget I even saw it (Yeah Contagion, I forgot I even watched your overrated garbage movie, you're fucking irrelevant!)

But I'm talking about decisions that will shit on you for years and years.  Relationships. Jobs. A degree you take out private loans to pay for and gets you nowhere.  You may notice some bitterness on that last one, and that's good because it's quite palpable.  So if you ask me if I regret going to a private school for a degree I'm currently having finding no use for other than a coaster in my room at my moms house where I live at age 24, I'll answer it in two parts.  Yes I regret having to shell out $300+ each month for that coaster/degree, no doubt about it I am not doing well enough in life to piss away that kind of money on the equivalent to having a fucking star named after me.  But no I don't regret making that horrible decision because now I'm forced to deal with it every day.  And that makes me who I am today.  Do I believe in fate? I don't know really, I just believe things are going to happen, and every day that I continue to be able to say and do whatever I want really, is a pretty good day.  You worry me America, and I wouldn't have it any other way.  Now go back to your regularly scheduled binge eating.