Hating the people on the TV box

The other day my cousin said he hated Kim Kardashian.  Now on the surface this seems like a perfectly logical statement about a preening, famous because her dad and her ridiculous hindquarters(ASS) and sex tapes with C list musicians, super slutbot with the personality of drywall, but dig deeper and realize hating this insignificant silicone moron is quite pointless and not worth any of our time.  I don't have enough time in my day to exercise hate towards a person I've a) never met and b) has zero effect on my day to day life.

We say it all the time, "hate is a strong word". Not as strong as violence, but still a fairly strong word in our vast dictionary of muscle bound words.  It's a strong emotion to feel hate towards someone, but hate can be both rational and irrational.  You can hate a general class of people or race, the latter making you a racist of course, the former for example would be hating the general clientele of Lady Jane's.  Neither can be considered really rational since like I said about the Kardashian bitch, you really don't know those people.  You know what they're about in general and you can stereotype of course, but that's pretty ignorant wouldn't you say?

Now the fun part, rational hate! I hate small talk! I hate going to JD Oxfords! I hate the options I have to be elected president of our country! I hate stupid motherfuckers! Ahhhhh that feels so good! See what I'm doing here? I have a passionate emotional feeling of negativity towards things I have first hand experienced and decided that those things inspire anger, frustration, and general unhappiness within me when I am subjected to them.  So now think about some things you think you hate (I thought of some things I thought I hated too for example mushrooms(nonpsychadellic!) I don't hate them I just dislike their taste, in other words, mushrooms don't upset me when they're in my food.) and think about if you really hate those things, people, and yes, the people on your television and radio.

Do you hate Ke$ha? Or are you just mad that a no talent super skank has a shit ton of money you will never in your life get to see? I for one, fall into the latter. So fuck that bitch, she doesn't get the hate from me, just grotesque envy of her vast wealth achieved by incomprehensible means.

Now a funny video I hope you don't HATE!

Texting, eating, drinking (soda)...oh and driving.

You ever have like a brush with death and you get that super panicked feeling inside for just a moment? It's the moment where apparently your life is supposed to flash before your eyes and you're supposed to thank a higher power that you didn't get T-Boned by an 18 wheeler if you weren't aware.  Either that is just another bullshit creation of the media or I have a weird response to my mortality.  I swear every time I have those brushes with the grim reaper I just find myself being extraordinarily annoyed by the way dangerous situation that has happened upon me. 

I swear I hit black ice last year and spun around on the expressway and all the while I was doing 360s with my 99 Ford Taurus I was just thinking "Shit, really? Black ice takes me out? How fucking lame" Then I came to rest and I was fine but still I don't remember feeling any terror or fear.

I'm not saying that because I'm tough because I'm not I'm actually a major pussy in typical situations where fear is an expected human emotion.  I just don't want to die in a stupid way is that too much to ask? Another thing is I'm me and if you know me then you're going to make assumptions what caused me to careen into a concrete median. 

Honestly guys if I go out while I'm driving, it's going to be an embarrassing story that involves an unnecessary text, Mcdonalds fries, and possibly reaching for my Ipod that fell on the passenger seat floor so I can change the song from the shitty Sara Bareilles song I downloaded (Paid for) to the even shittier Selena Gomez song I downloaded (Illegally).

Decided I'll do a weekly Top 5 because I am not so surprisingly lazy.

Video of The Day