Wednesday, March 27, 2013

The OK Cupid Diaries: Ladypink007 is 25 and she likes things.

My self-summary
I am a fun loving girl that is very out going.I work with special needs children. I love my job. I am going back to school for nursing. I just recently got a puppy and she is my life. I am a very independent person. 
What is "fun loving" anyway? I can't imagine that's an attractive quality, when I think of fun loving I think of dogs and cats and dogs playing with cats. "I just recently" is a stupid use of words. Are you sure you work with special needs and aren't actually one of them? Are you American revolution independent or Destiny's Child independent?

What I’m doing with my life
I have everything I want except my other half that completes me. I have a house, a puppy, a good job, going to school. I just need that man in my life that makes me happy. 
I don't want to talk to anyone who uses the term "other half that completes me" without a hint of sarcasm. So far, so boring. We've basically learned she has things and now she needs one more thing with a penis attached.

I’m really good at
I am really good at taking care of people. Hence my job and what I am going into. 
Oh pulling out the fancy pants words with "hence" oh boy! Now I know this girl is a smartie!

The first things people usually notice about me
My eyes and smile 
So true, since generally it's not best to stare at her chest upon introduction.

Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I like peanut butter, pickles, and ice cream. I don't really like reading but Fifty Shades of Grey caught my attention. I like going to plays and concerts. My all time favorite band is The Fray. 
She likes some things that most every human being likes. Reading is hard and boring unless it's about older women getting boned.  Her favorite band ever is The Fray, I'll let you insert your own joke there.

The six things I could never do without
1. Family
2. Cell phone
3. Food
4. Money
5. People
6. Coffee 
1. Yeah
2. Okay
3. Sure
4. Yawn
5. People?
6. Beverage
I spend a lot of time thinking about
I think of how can I make more money. 
"What if I sold my brain to science? I'm not even using it anyway! When is American Idol on? I hope Devin wins he's so hawt!"
You should message me if
honest, loyal, caring 
Dumb, boring, money

Monday, March 25, 2013

The OK Cupid Diaries: Smashley307, Yahtzee legend.

My self-summary
Working, studying and playing in beautiful Colorado-

Sure, those are typically things people do in places.

Originally from Wyoming, I moved to the Denver area about two and a half years ago for school. It's been a great change, there are so many fun things to do in this city! Between work and school I stay pretty busy, but recently I've taken up running (if I can even call it that) and just signed up for a spring kickball team!
I'm not sure what you would call running other than running, but whatever. It's truly exciting to live in a city where kickball exists, which is most cities that access to beer and weed is prevalent.

I enjoy spending time with my family, especially my two super cute nephews. I have great friends who I enjoy trying out new restaurants with, lounging at the pool or hitting a happy hour. I like to laugh, bake, try new recipes and spend time with my dog!
Yeah everyone loves their family blah blah. Great friends you try new restaurants with? Is that a real thing people do? Or is this purely a boring suburban white girl thing? I'm guessing the latter. Oh look she likes to laugh, that's good, has she read her own profile ya think? I don't know what hitting a happy hour is either since this woman clearly doesn't imbibe on alcohol. That poor, poor dog.

I'm not interested in rushing into a relationship. I'm looking to meet worthwhile people with similar interests and see where it may lead. 
Doesn't want to be in relationship on first date is what this means. Marriage will be discussed on second date.
What I’m doing with my life
Working, finishing my undergrad, and looking into masters programs. 
 Yeah you said that earlier.
I’m really good at
 Yahtzee? Yahtzee?? We're not really talking about Yahtzee in a dating profile are we? I bet she's a beast at Candyland too. Seriously what the fuck? I mean you gotta save some of your gems for down the line, can't be letting loose with your old board game prowess lest you scare potential suitors away with intimidation via dice rolling games.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
A few of my favorite things as of late -

Food- Sushi, but I'll eat pretty much anything!
Yahtzee dice?

Show - I don't have cable so I'm pretty out of the loop on the whole tv situation.
Hi, I'm the Internet, have you heard about me?

Music - Being from Wyoming I obviously love country, but like lots of other music too.
Translation: I don't like music.

Books- I really enjoy reading but I get most of my book recommendations from my 16 year old cousin haha. 
I read Twilight.
I enjoyed doing this, that's why I did it, not meant to be hurtful towards this person I just think online dating is mostly absurd and should be taken as such. Clearly "Smashley" and I would not make a great pair, but she's probably a sweet girl (maybe) who has mostly gotten by on decent looks and well that's mostly it. If you disagree, comment, but either way I'm going to keep doing these because these profiles provide me with limitless entertainment and I hope they do for you as well. Good day.
Vince Louis